[ r i n . a i j y o ] – flavor of life, love, and all that you dream of

…shouldn’t exist in the first place.

And why? Because you don’t go looking for relationships and then measure how great they are by “how much” you get out of it. Or “what you want” out of it. And wonder what it is you’re looking for if you happen to hit a lot of bumps along the way. A relationship ISN’T a business transaction that you can expect self-profit out of. It’s a lot of giving without expecting anything back in return. Granted, you should know why you’re entering into a relationship (be it for money, for friendship, for romance, for marriage, for fun…) and get that straight from the very start. And remain honest if that reason changes. But you don’t necessarily need to know what you want, because that’s unfair to whoever you’re entering into a relationship with. What if him or her doesn’t live up to your what I want criteria, hmm? But you still “love” the person. Ok, I’m ranting. BUT:

A relationship is something two people need to work at–not one person. A relationship is such exactly because you’re supposed to grow together in it, not put it on hold when you get confused about why it’s not smooth sailing. You talk. You cry. You scream. You laugh. You figure things out. Together. It’s not as simple as “I love you baby so it’s alright”. Your actions have to match up to your words. Heck, if you said you loved your wife but slept with another woman, I wouldn’t think you loved your wife at all! That’s NOT love. Love is much, much more than that.

A relationship is love AND more. It’s life, with all its ups and downs, SHARED. Values. Perspectives. Likes. Dislikes. Personalities. Administration. Economics. History. 

It’s saddening that many guys and girls nowadays don’t understand what a relationship is anymore. Everything’s been commercialized and prettified by movies, dramas, plays, the mass media, fluffy romance novels, teen novels… And the worse part is that thousands–no, MILLIONS–of people buy into the madness day after day.

i’m tired of seeing people around me getting hurt for the wrong reasons. Because of another’s ignorance. Because of their own ignorance. Excuse my “Bible talk” if you please, but it’s part of who I am, and I live unapologetically by the Word of my God. Love, I believe, is best explained by His Holy word. What was it again… Love if faithful, love is kind, love does not bear grudges? In the book of Corinthians, can’t remember where or what. How can we understand love if we don’t understand how God loves us in the first place?

He is the creator of all things, and He created love. Using our human understanding to work things out isn’t going to help anything–it’ll just frustrate. I’m too tired to continue this centuries-old discussion, but what I really want to say is:

You can only truly love another when you love God first.

REALLY, OK! :( I’M NOT KIDDING. Try it for yourself. You’ll be amazed.